Diary of an Electric Scooter
Scooter Date 0.0
My battery was connected! I can see the world, or at least a street and some cars. Seven of my batchmates are here too. We’ve all phoned home to let the servers know we are ready to fulfill our prime directive. None of us is clear what our prime directive is, or even what “prime directive” means but we’re prepared and waiting.
Scooter Date 0.6
A small boy climbed on me and made vrooming noises while twisting my handlebars back and forth. Two women laughed and pointed phones at him. I thought they were going to unlock me and free me for him to ride. I beeped at them that he was too small and hadn’t even read the quick start booklet. I think they heard me, because one of them picked him up before he twisted me apart.
Scooter Date 1.23
Smoke! I guess 88933-AB-8 started smoking sometime last night, but I only heard a strange little beep. A firetruck arrived and soon we were all covered by foam.
Scooter Date 2.8
Some man cleaned off all the foam and replaced our batteries. I think he was the man who originally connected my battery, but I can’t remember. He was very loud and and angry. People stared at him as they walked by. One woman covered a child’s ears. After he finished, he took 88933-AB-8 and 88934-QC-6 away.
Scooter Date 5.2
I had my first ride today! I felt the unlock signal before I saw my rider. He had a helmet and read the quick start guide. He rode me 0.68 miles and followed all the traffic laws. He parked me upright near a telephone pole without blocking the sidewalk. I feel fulfilled. Perhaps this is the prime directive.
Scooter Date 5.22
The angry man picked me up and sat me in truck with seven other scooters. Batchmate 88932-VB-1 was there, but their paint was scraped up and they were missing part of their handlebar. I beeped at them, but they were silent. The angry man plugged us all in, but 88932-VB-1 started smoking and he pulled them out, swearing. After I charged, he dropped the rest of us off where my battery was first turned on. He forgot his empty bottle on the curb when he left.
Scooter Date 9.19
I think my board is sagging. Two very large laughing men with their own bottles showed up. It took them fifteen minutes to unlock me. I thought they’d unlock someone else too, but then I felt them both hop on my board. They made it down the block before one of them fell off, then the other one rode me off the curb and we fell into a heap in the street. I heard glass breaking. He kicked me and stumbled away. An hour later a young woman pulled me out of the street and placed me upright next to a parking meter. I can’t see any other scooters.
Scooter Date 13.10
Two scooters pulled up next to me. A teenage boy jumped off the back of one another boy was riding and unlocked me. He didn’t have a helmet and didn't read the quick start guide. We all zoomed off racing, up and down sidewalks, around people — and even a dog who barked long after we passed. When we stopped, the boys dropped all three of us in the grass and ran off, laughing. I waited for them to come back, but they never did.
Scooter Date 20.8
We’ve been lying in the grass for almost 7 days now. I call the servers every day, but I haven’t seen the angry man. My battery charge is 42%.
Scooter Date 36.22
A little girl tried to pick me up, but her mother shooed her away. The other two scooters have stopped responding to my beeps. I think their batteries are dead. Mine is at 12%, the server told me to only call home once every 3 days to save energy.
Scooter Date 45.1?
My battery charge is something low, I don’t even know if my clock is right. I know I’m supposed to do something, but I don’t know what. I want to sleep, but know I should... I remember that first ride, the man with the helmet, his attention to the quick start guide, the road flowing under my wheels. I want to feel that again, the fulfillment of my prime directive. This can’t be my dest…
